Creating space to pause, reflect and share experiences with dying and death

All Stories

All Stories

When my mind goes, I’m out of here

When my mind goes, I’m out of here

As my dad, given less than 6 months and had lived 5 years. He lay in bed his last 6 weeks. A time of words and opportunities. Heart said and felt. Love shared doing normal things. When he said “I am lucky but when my mind goes,

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If only you knew what I know dear reader

If only you knew what I know dear reader

I knew you were there. I knew you were holding my hand. I am so very proud of you. Your girls are so like you! Happy, curious, full of laughs. I would do it all again. I love you. These are the words I hear. If only

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I promise not to let that happen

I promise not to let that happen

Yesterday my first grandson was born to my father’s first grandson, a father who had but 7 months to know his first grandson before passing. My son, my first and his brothers never had a grandfather despite several relationships. I promise not to let that happen!

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The threads that weave us together

The threads that weave us together

I was 42, hadn’t talked to my uncle in years. I did not know he was dying… I found myself one night at sunset, walking the beaches we’d visit with him when we were kids, watching the sunset and reading poetry on death and dying. Woke up

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I flew back and forth every month

I flew back and forth every month

I remember asking you to move to my home so I could take care of you. You did not wish to, so I flew back and forth every month to be with you. I flew back for your 50th birthday and left New Year’s Day. You died

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Weren’t we lucky

Weren’t we lucky

Hey Dad — Weren’t we lucky to be together when you drew your last, laboured breath? I am eternally grateful for all that you did for me; for all that we shared; and for all of the memories I will cherish — until I take my last,

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Not sure if one is harder than the other

Not sure if one is harder than the other

Who do I write about? 1) The abrupt death of my husband 20 years ago? Or, 2) What I am going through now with the slow death from dementia of my sister? Both are hard — not sure if one is harder than the other. Not sure

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Gratitude abounds

Gratitude abounds

I cared for my mother in the last 4 months of her life. She learned to Surrender And Become My Baby. It was a privilege to have held her as she took her last breath. Forever changed gratitude abounds.

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How much time do we have?

How much time do we have?

For me there is a comfort in sadness. There is comfort knowing the end is inevitable for all of us and we all come to the same place. I teared up with the piece missing the person in the photo. It is so simply and cleanly shows

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For years my arms ached and my heart cried

For years my arms ached and my heart cried

I had never attended the death of my child before. I didn’t always do it right. I didn’t always know what to do. So I did as I had done throughout your life. I sang to you, I stroked your hair, but I didn’t hold you. Moving

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